We received an interesting email a few weeks back but have not had a chance to post it yet in regards to how to handle the family of someone you broke up with. Here it goes:
"T$ and Ray Ray. I am writing you ladies for some unsugarcoated advice. lol. About 4 months ago I broke up with a guy I have been dating for 2 years. In the time we dated I only met or hung out with his mom on 2 occasions (she lives out of state) and in the last 6 months of our dating she would call me from time to time just to say hi. So since I have broken up with him im in a weird place bc his mom still calls me. It got even weirder a week ago when she said she was in town and wanted to hang out with me. Even his brother is bombarding my facebook wall talking about "my moms is in town and wanted to get up with you." I do not feel the guy I used to date is completely over the situation as he calls me from time to time still and ask me if I am dating etc. I don't want to be mean to his mother but at the same time I do not want to meet up with her. I feel like I am being spied on. I don't want her knowing about my life for real like that anymore bc she doesn't need to go off and tell her son. It's just weird. What do you guys think and what should I do?"
Well, well, well...that is a tough one. You broke up with ol dude so you would think his family was included in the severance of the relationship. From what you have told us, it does not seem like you were that close to his mother at all really and it doesn't appear you two have kids together so technically the only thing you owe her is respect.
We feel that his family is going hard to try to get you to hangout with his mother so she can persuade you into getting back into a relationship with her son. Honestly, what on earth would you all talk about if you went to lunch with her? Would you talk about Basketball Wives and the latest fashions? I think not. 9 times out of 10 she'd be asking you questions about your life (which she will run back and tell her son) and her son will come up as a topic...one you do not wish to discuss. Anything she has to say to you can be said over the phone.
We suggest the next time she calls you politely pick up the phone and hear what she has to say. If she is asking to take you to lunch or see you one of the following things can be done:
A. Politely explain that you are busy and won't be able to see her.
or if you got a pair of kahunas
B. Tell her that because you broke up with her son and things are still relatively fresh from the break up this is extremely awkward for you and you are not sure if this is the greatest idea for either of you at this time.
Just because you met the lady and she was nice to you doesn't mean that you have to subject yourself to awkwardness or being spied on. At the end of the day if you feel you ex is still holding on to a glimmer of hope for you all to get back together kicking it with his mother definitely is sending mixed signals.
How would you all handle this situation? Do you think she should still hang out and communicate with his mom? Let us know!