"Honesty is an expensive gift. Do not expect it from cheap people"---Warren Buffet

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Monday, December 6, 2010

Maybe Your "Hangtime" Ain't Hanging?

Some men out here have great personalities, great careers, great looks, know how to treat a lady, but when he drops them boxers to the floor...IT'S A PROBLEM! Suddenly, all your hopes for having a successful relationship dropped to the floor with his boxers...you discover your worst nightmare....HE HAS A COCKTAIL WIENER!

This post is dedicated to the hundreds of horror stories I have heard from my friends (white, black (not all black men are packing heat ya feel me?), hispanic, asian) who have had encounters with a man who literally has something short of a large clitoris and set of balls. Here's signs that you are in fact NOT well endowed.

1. Are Your Condoms Sagging?

A condom is supposed to have a snug fit with a little space at the top for the semen when you ejaculate. It is supposed to be a snug fit so that it does not slip off during sex. If your condom has ever got lost in someone's vagina, if it looks like your penis is wearing a poncho...IT'S A PROBLEM and you should probably proceed to question 2.

2. Is a Super Plus Tampax Bigger Than Your Penis?

Go inside your girlfriend/mother/sister/female friend's bathroom and look under the sink and you will a find a variety of boxes of tampons. Pull out a tampon of the largest absorbency and compare it to your penis. If your penis is the same size or smaller...IT'S A PROBLEM...proceed to question 3.

3. Are Their Rumor's You Don't Have That Meatwork?

If more than 2 women you date have said to someone else that you have a small penis...then it's true...IT'S A PROBLEM...proceed to question 4.

4. Do Females Insist on Being on Top, Friend's Only, or You Giving Them HOURS of Head?

If the answer is yes...IT'S A PROBLEM...proceed to question 5.

5. Compare Your Penis to a Man in a Porn (#nohomo)

It's true that many male pornstars have that mandingo...call it an occupational requirement. However, if their penises make yours look like a 5 year olds...IT'S A PROBLEM.

6. Can a Female Put Her Lips on Your Stomach While Giving Oral Sex Without Much Effort?

If she does not choke, gargle, or make a single noise in doing the process, it can be concluded either she is Karrine Stephans or IT'S A PROBLEM!

If you would like to know whether your "hangtime" is really hanging, fill out the below form and adhere to the following rules:

1. DO NOT include your real name.
2. DO NOT include your face in the picture.

We legally promise that we will keep all pictures and responses confidential and the ONLY responses or discussion in regards to the picture will be done via the email that you provide on the below form.

*By clicking submit you are legally allowing us to respond ONLY to the email you provided and you are legally stating that you have the right to use/distribute this picture.*

Signing Out...T$ and Ray Ray...saving sex lives 1 small pickle at a time!

Is a Small Penis a Deal Breaker?
Yes---I can't do that shit
No---If I like him I can look past it
pollcode.com free polls


  1. I can't believe some of you ladies are saying you could look past it on the poll. Yall are good for that! Maybe you haven't had good sex before or maybe you are not sure what is meant by small??? I think they meant small as in 4 inches or less...

  2. Yeah a small one cant do nothin for me, i know i would cheat, sorry.

  3. I'd have to end it the second he dropped his pants...bc I'd cheat too

  4. coming from a lil dick guy... I was born this way. Bitches get born wit holes and call it a day. Only thing to make ya dick bigger is surgery. *kanye shrug*

    least i kno how to stroke mine... thats a bout it. kudos to da big dick men out there. yall makin it extra hard for me


  5. These woman are ruthless! What about all that love stuff you all preach all the time? Why cant the little dudes bring out toys and satisfy? is it really that crucial. ( and im not a lil guy) . Im just sayin

  6. ^^^ BOY STOP! Sex is a big part of the relationship for men (probably a majority of it) so you know you wouldn't be faithful with a girl who was dry all the time or wack in bed for whatever reason. Don't act like it's superficial....just like you wouldn't stick with a girl bc her pussy stank and you love her no one is sticking with a guy who can't satisfy her...toys aren't the same as the real thing come on son!

    Guys ALWAYS have so many requirements (hair done, nails, done, everything did) so why can't we have ONE major requirement...you have a normal sized dick?!?!

  7. Ok and about Mr. Lil But Know How to Stroke It up there...no such thing patna! You dismissed boo!

  8. wat up ladies it's K. i believe everything but number five (six is jus out right hilarious). i've seen some dicks in pornos that if i try to measure up to i wouldn't even have sex or have the confidence to have sex. i love my dick size (i know myself very well) and i love eating pussy till it drips, so i always have a blast in bed (on the flip side if you can't suck a dick i really don't need the face)! also, if the majority of sensitive tissue is like 3-4 inches in the vagina then wat is the point of an 8,9, or 10 inch dick (jus a waist of muscle that could have went to his brain LOL)? a woman once told me it's bout that girth and dat motion in the ocean (i know that sounded corny LOL). so if you are 3-4 inches truthfully you're good (not with every woman tho). i'm into having sacred sex or sex magic. thats sex that starts from the crown down (to the root chakra). there's nothing like it! fuck with the gods ladies and not mere men!

  9. K...that g spot needs to get hit...period.point.blank...so the 3-4 inch dicks won't cut it LOL!

  10. Why am I only seeing this post now? Its July.


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