In browsing through tweets today I noticed a retweet of one of my friends that read
"@GyamfiPedigree: Like what is the point of getting Ass Naked in a man bed, spending the night and Not fucking Him! #GrowUp"
...and with that tweet we realized that often times
ADULT women are guilty of sending mixed signals to guys about when or if sex is going to be served up on a silver platter. As women we control when and if sex is going to go down and it's okay to not be ready to go "the extra mile" with a guy...but if you aren't, there are certain situations that should be avoided. Read the below to determine if you have ever done these things and more importantly if you are currently doing these things because if so this behavior needs to come to a hault...many of us have been guilty of these things, but after a certain age this conduct just isn't cute anymore ladies.
1. The Location & Time:
Ladies, if you date or chill with a guy and you all have chemistry he is going to be sexually attractive to you and vicea versa(and there is nothing wrong with that)...however in certain situations men can not think past their sexual desires and they will try you. In some of these instances you can not get offended that he did because you sent signals out that you were hot and bothered and ready to take it there. If you are not ready you should avoid hanging with the man at these times and places:
A. His bedroom:
I know it's not rocket science but inside a bedroom there is a bed and generally only two things take place on a bed; sleeping and sex. Although this is not rocket science for some reason we continuously hear stories about women who enter a man's bedroom and lay with him under the covers with no intention on having sex. When you get in a man's bed the only thing he can thinking is "bawchicawahnwahn"
If the guy you date of chill with lives in a studio apartment set up (i.e. the bed and living room are synonymous) it is important that you avoid doing activities that require you to be on his bed at all cost if you do not want to have sex with him.
B. Time:
Anytime past 10pm is booty call hours. If you go over to a man's house at anytime past this hour to hang out with him it can be assumed that you are spending the night and you are willing to give up that ass.
DO NOT venture to a man's house after the club and climb into his bed if you are not willing to take off those drawls.
2. Conduct:
In addition your conduct around him should not give him signals he should be playing R.Kelly "Seems Like Your Ready" on his ipod speakers and pulling condoms out of his drawer. Do not allow the man to finger you, kiss your neck, suck your breast, eat you out, get you half naked, take off ANY article of your clothing, give him a hand job, play "just the head" game, play "just a kiss on it" game, etc. if you do not plan on having sex with him. Although you like this man and you are sexually attracted to him as well, you should conduct yourself in a way you would have in the courting stages of dating...there can be cuddling, there can be kissing, but if you do not want to have sex with him just yet this cuddling and kissing should not be overly sexual and it should be done at appropriate times and appropriate locations as to not give off mixed signals you are ready for baby making practice.
In addition do not do the following:
A. Have Sleepovers:
He is not your homegirl and he is not gay. If a sleepover
MUST happen (i.e someone is to drunk to drive home, it starts sleeting, etc.) than someone needs to catch the sofa. Be firm about letting him that sex is NOT going down by saying something like "I don't think you should drive in this condition. I have extra pillows and blankets so you are welcome to sleep on my sofa."
B. Get Too Drunk Around Him:
Some of us are guilty of acting "overly friendly" when intoxicated and when drunk your true feelings and personality are guaranteed to come out. If you are hanging out with a guy who you have feelings for and you are sexually attracted to, it is a good idea to curb your drink intake so that you do not put yourself in a compromising situation where he tries to play the "just the head" game.
3. Conversation:
We have heard countless stories from our male friends who sit on the phone having anything short of phone sex with a woman who has
NO INTENTIONS on delivering what she is talking about anytime soon. Do not talk about sex, sex positions, how great your head giving skills are, how great your sex skills are, how you hate wearing panties, all the sex toys you have, all the lingerie you have, how horny you are, the things you want to do to him, and the things you want him to do to you if you have no intentions on acting out these things with him anytime in the near future.
Bottomline: Part of adult relationships in 2011 is sex...and it's a
VERY big part of relationships but if you are not ready you should not give off these signals as it can be interpreted as a sign of immaturity, teasing, or cause unnecessary drama with someone you have great potential with. Sending mixed signals about sex to a man is equvialent to having a man talk a bunch of shit to you about how he is going to take you out shopping, on vacation, or to a fancy dinner and then not delievering....you'd be more pissed and annoyed than if you were on your period on a 10 hour roadtrip with a bunch of wild kids and no tampons...
PISSED.
I mean come on Vivica...you should sit down in 2011 before this gets even more embarrassing than the 50 cent thing and your botched plastic surgery. At the tender age of 45 you are straight fucking up home girl. Big ups to Slimm though...he definitely pulled the wool over your eyes and is about to be going straight to the bank shortly since we hear there will be no prenup on deck!
Can we consider you a rapper? All he does is yell his name, have automatic assault riffles go off in the back of every song, and say Pow or Bow. Not to mention how he embarrassed himself by going on 106 & Park and saying he was going back to school to major in geometry. Sit your retarded overly tatted ass down.
So at first we liked her....that is until she started making statements that she needed to take a break from music. What?! You have like 4 songs out that people know...Beyonce took a 6 month break in her WHOLE career which is phenomenal and you already tired? Sounds a little hiotty tiotty to me...get over yourself. Just sit down for 2011...maybe permanently since you aren't hungry enough.
We know, we know...some of you will say "awww that's mean" but lets be honest...what other roles could a girl as fat and unattractive as her get in Hollywood? She will always be type casted. Might as well sit down in 2011 and do the Jenny Craig thing to reinvent yourself.
If this fool makes another "One Wish" related song....yeah just sit the fuck down!
Although she is gorgeous, she has been known to have a nasty attitude (Running Russell Simons) and now that Kanye is no longer showing her off she is jumping from actor to athlete and showing little signs of having any talent. She is flirting with being placed in the bopper/groupie/professional leg spreader category.
Face it, Diddy has been whack and has never been a lyricist. We all know that he has ruined the careers of many. In addition, the other girl is hit in the face and looks old enough to be Dawn's mom. Just GTF in 2011.
It's a rags to riches story that made many of us laugh...but seriously all these remixes and part 2 songs...no one gives a fuck anymore. Sorry. *kanye shrug*
How did she even get popular? She looks like a nutra rat you could find in a New Orleans canal and she messes with Z, sub column c, roman numeral under that sub column III list celebrities. We were personally pissed when she was running around Atlanta making this her second hometown. Good luck being locked up...hope your "stacks" can get you out Kat...LMAO
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