It is no secret, men and women have different view points on many subjects. However, every once and awhile it's amazing me some of the stark differences in view point that each party can have on a subject. It's conversations like these that I value and part of the reason I suggest that everyone get some true friends of the opposite sex (not one's trying to bang you) and just sit down and talk to them about all kinds of topics. Cue the conversation I had with one of my best friends, Harry (a full blooded American straight male) last week. Harry revealed to me the meaning of the old adage "you can't find love in the club," by telling me that men put women in categories with how and where they meet them (i.e. wifey material is not meet out at a club, lounge, or bar but by chance or through friends, work, school, etc.) He even stated that he just can not take a girl serious he has meet in certain scenarios even after getting to know her better. Furthermore, Harry went on to say that 90% of the men out at a club/lounge/bar are NOT relationship material...they are there to find someone to fuck.
The conversation I had with Harry perplexed me greatly as I strongly believe that where you meet someone has little or nothing to do with the type of person they are or their intentions. After all,
"...the same people who go to the club are the same people singing in the choir at church, going to the grocery store, and doing regular day to day things that EVERYONE does. Additionally if the person you met is deemed to be a certain type of way because of where you met them...what the hell does that say about you?"
I would say the following factors have more to do with what type of person someone you met is than where you met them:
Conduct: So what does where you meet someone have to do with the type of person they are? I would say their conduct at where you meet them is the true tell-tell about their personality and character. For example, you meet a girl at a lounge, bar, club, or event and she is not dressed like a hooker, she is casually sipping drinks with her friends...chances are she's a normal girl going out to have a good time. Then you have the girl who is a sloppy mess, dancing with her panties exposed, and letting men dry fuck her brains out on the dance floor...chances are she's a hoe. Even still, there is the girl who you see out at the EVERY club EVERY night the club is hot. It's as if her whole wardrobe consist of club dresses...chances are she's a desperate hoe.
Conversation: In places where music is played, it may be hard to have a serious conversation. However, the gravity and depth of what is said in those short exchanges can say a lot about someone. Is the person you are talking to not very cerebral or just plain stupid?
Time: In due time, everything about a person will be revealed. People can only keep up an act for so long. So the man you meet at church, in due time you can figure out he's just a sleazy as the guy you meet at the bar last week. The girl you meet at the club drinking, in due time you can figure out she is intelligent and funny as well as sexy or you could find out she is a boring bitch with a bad body.
Do you judge people based off where you meet them? Why or why not? If you judge someone based off where you meet them, once you get to know them outside of the setting you meet them in, can you form a different opinion on them? Let me know and don't sugar coat it!
It depends on how you carry yourself. I met my husband in the club and he put a ring on my finger a year later. However, im sure if i had no depth and was just a pretty face, i would have fallen in the 'just a fuck' category like everyone else in his past....ReplyDelete
Sounds like your homeboy is the one with no depth. What idiot really judges people based off if they are in the club or not? Maybe the girl was there for her birthday, job promotion, any reason to celebrate. Everyone likes to drink, unwind, and listen to music. If that is what he feels makes a hoe then he's lost. This is coming from another full blood American straight maleReplyDelete